I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Randomize
