Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize