Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
