I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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