Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
