I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
