you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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