There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
That was before I lit my hair on fire
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
