is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
