it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
