im gay
i know
yea but for you.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Randomize
