I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
You brought string cheese to the strip club
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
