I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
