I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize