; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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