all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
