Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize