if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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