Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
