We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
