Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
