lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize