Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
