Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Randomize
