I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Randomize
