I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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