Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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