why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
