And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
