I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Randomize
