Your tits are I can't wait for
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize
