It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
