Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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