help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
