I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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