i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize