no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Randomize
