none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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