1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Randomize