So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
