She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
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