i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
