I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
farters have to be the big spoon...
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
