so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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