'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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