You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
oh god the rape fog is back!
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
