Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Randomize
