Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
