never play flip cup with pint glasses
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
