Your tits are I can't wait for
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize