I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
