Christians are straight up FREAKS
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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